


Life on Shuffle

by ReturnFrom_86



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Ficlets, Fluff, Light Smut, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-08-31
Updated: 2013-09-09
Packaged: 2017-12-25 03:35:17
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 11
Words: 8,020
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/948146
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ReturnFrom_86/pseuds/ReturnFrom_86
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Basically, wrote little destiel drabbles about the first 10 songs on shuffle, some fluff, some AU, teensy bit of smut. Not in any order so if you don't like a chapter, can be skipped.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Just Dance

The reason for the copious amounts of alcohol was strange to Dean, usually when he hit the bottle hard it was to numb his feelings and forget the nightmares. But the warmth in his chest wasn't all from the whiskey, and the booze just seemed to be amplifying his emotions. The dark haired man next to him looked up from where his head had been resting on Dean's shoulder. "Whas chu thinkin' 'bout?" he slurred, bright blue eyes unfocused. _Maybe we shoudn't have opened up that last bottle, dude's wasted_ thought Dean. "You" replied Dean. The ex-angel giggled, "Bad things I hope." Dean smirked at that as Cas snuggled in closer and Dean squeezed him tighter towards him.

The music drifted through the room, soothing and low. Dean's thumb circled Cas' shoulder and he seemed to almost be purring. They had been officially a couple for 4 months now and Dean had honestly never been happier. Thankfully Sam seemed to have some kind of brotherly sixth sense and always seemed to be busy looking for a hunt whenever Dean got the urge for a snuggling night in with Cas. Which he'd never, ever admit to on pain of death. _It's manly snuggling anyway, I got a bottle of Jack in my hand, and a sexy son of a bitch by my side._ During his reverie Cas woke from his quick, drunken nap. "Stop thinkin' so hard Dean, you hurt yoursel' ." Cas grinned at his own joke, but started giggling as Dean pinned him down on the seat of the couch. "Haha, very funny Cas." Cas' grin never left his face, "you're so seri--ri-o- not fun, Dean". Cas tried to reach up and bite Dean's lower lip, but Dean stayed out of reach, teasing the drunken man.

Jus then the music changed, the beat was a lot faster and pulsing. Cas let out a gasp, and his eyes went wide. "Dance with me Dean!" It was Dean's turn to start giggling, and he giggled ever harder as shockingly Cas managed, inebriated as he was, to roll Dean off of him. He stood up a little unsteadily, gripping Dean's head for support. "Cas, do you even know what this song is?" _Probably some stupid thing Sammy snuck in to the playlist_ But Cas wasn't paying attention, and to be honest, once he started moving his hips in time with the beat, Dean didn't care either. Cas gripped Dean's hands and tried to pull him to his feet. "I don't dance Cas". Cas pouted at that, "Not even for me Dean? Just dance, It's gonna be ok, I won't tell." The beat was getting to Dean, and the way it made Cas' blue eyes shine, he couldn't resist and rose to his feet. Cas let out a delighted cry, and started jumping to the beat, letting his arms flail, Dean would have thought he looked ridiculous, but his face had such a look of freedom, and happiness that he thought Cas looked like a professional dancer. Imitating Cas' moves, Dean let himself go, the two of them dancing together and dancing apart, in the little nit of floor in front of the sofa. As the last beats of the song died away they both collapsed entwined together onto the sofa, gasping for breath. "s'love you 'ean" Cas mumbled into Dean's neck. "I love you too." But Cas was already snoring.


	2. We are Young

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> High school AU

The boy with the unruly dark hair was muttering into his book, Dean was trying his best to ignore the urge he'd had for the past 8 weeks of ruffling his hand through that hair. They'd gotten to be friends over their study periods, but Dean doubted Cas would appreciate being fondled like that. "Dean, you are not paying attention to me. I asked if you've done your most recent math revision. What are you thinking about?" Dean tried to pull his mind away from the thoughts of the boys soft hair, and into the library, "I, eh, you want to go to the end of term party with me next friday?" Dean had no idea where that came from, it had just jumped out of his mouth, well no backing out now. Cas would say no anyway, parties weren't really his thing, and this one would be full of drunken jocks, and Dean didn't want to be protecting Cas from his other friends all night. He put on his winning smile to show that it hadn't been a mistake, because Dean was cool, and never did something that he didn't want to. Cas blushed slightly, almost throwing Dean's smile off as his heart palpitated at the how the pinkness suited Cas. "Dean I appreciate the offer but- ", "That's cool dude, if you don't want to go, I understand." Dean cut him off. Cas looked a little hurt, and his gaze drifted down to his books. But when he looked back up his eyes were steeled, piercing blue, Dean was kind of turned on. "Dean, I was not going to refuse your offer, you did not let me finish. I was simply going to admit that I have no transport to get me to the party. My brother has the car on fridays." It took a moment for Dean to clear his wandering thoughts again. "Oh, well, I'll give you a lift then." Shit, why did he keep blurting things out, no way could he roll up at the party of the year with Cas in his car like a date or something. "That is much appreciated Dean. Thank you." And Cas went back to his books, Dean's thoughts went back to combing his hands through the dark hair. Maybe he could take Cas in his car, like a date, maybe he could.

Finals were done, and thanks to Cas, Dean felt he'd actually done pretty well. He was parked outside Cas' house, a faint flutter in his stomach. As Cas got in the car Dean noticed he eyed Dean's arms, Dean was wearing a vest. A smug smile crossed Dean's lips as he pulled away. "Evening Cas." "Good-goodevening Dean." The rest of the short journey was spent listening to the radio. Dean hitting the steering wheel in beat to the song because he knew it would flex his upper arms. The effect it had on Cas was instant as the boy couldn't peel his eyes from Dean's arms. Dean put on his jock jacket when going into the party, much to the disappointment of Cas, to which Dean chuckled.

The party wasn't too bad, Dean stayed somewhat sober to keep an eye on Cas. He thought he wouldn't want to, but deep down, he got a bit of thrill from looking after Cas. Dean was leaning against a pillar in the house, gazing at Cas, who was surrounded by a group of the most popular cliques at school, he was regaling them with a particular story concerning one of his many older brothers. He was the life and soul of the party and everyone loved him. The party was still raging when Cas told Dean he felt sick. Dean put his jacket over Cas as they went outside for fresh air, Cas leaning against Dean's side, an arm slung around Dean's bare shoulders. "Thanks Dean, I think I'll head home now." Cas wasn't looking great, he'd obviously had way too much to drink. "I'll carry you home Cas, c'mon lean against me." And Cas did. They walked slowly, each savouring the closeness in their own way. Once outside Cas' house they stood for a while, not saying a word. Eventually Cas extracted himself from Dean's grasp and handed Dean back his jacket. "Must be cold, night Dean", Cas said, although Dean had only felt the cold when Cas had moved away. Green eyes lingered on blue ones for another second longer, as they moved away Dean moved forward, closing the gap between them. Dean put his hand on the back of Cas' head, running fingers through the strands, it felt even better than he'd imagined. Cas had his eyes closed, Dean leaned in closer, and placed a simple kiss on Cas' lips. Electricity flowed between them, as Dean broke away. "Night Cas." he grinned.


	3. Stairway to Heaven

Humans, they're such an anomaly. Especially the ones in Cas' charge. They hunt monsters and evil daily, but give them a beer and a slice of pie, and they'll be completely content. Cas would talk with Sam Winchester for hours about humans, and their little habits. Sam was always forthcoming with Cas' questions and Cas was eternally grateful. Dean Winchester, he was another story. Dean never let anything out if it wasn't some obscure reference or a sarcastic put down. Or a terrible joke, Sam was helping Cas to understand the awful jokes. The angel decided to get to the fundamentals of Dean, he would have to do his own research. The angel felt the stirrings of a thrill at the thought, which he suppressed. The research was simply to get to know his charges better, like he'd done with Sam. But deep down Cas knew Dean was different, the way Cas' eyes couldn't help but linger that bit longer on the hunters face. But Dean's mind was closed to his angel powers, no matter how hard he tried. Although he never tried too hard, scared of what he would find. So he decided to look for what made Dean tick, and he would start with the music collection in the Impala.

Organised chaos was how Dean would have described it, Cas was sure Dean had a system, but the angel couldn't make head or tail of it. Cas didn't dare touch the tape player in the Impala, he knew if he broke it Dean would kill him, celestial being or not. So he used his angel mojo to turn on the song Dean last played in the Impala. The gentle notes of a guitar came from the system, soft and clear, Cas leaned back, enjoying the calmness. The voice started, Cas thought the man almost sounded sad. "... buying a stairway to heaven..." Cas started at this. Staring intently at the sound system, as if it held the answer about a possible stairway to heaven.

The drivers side door opened, and Dean got in beside Cas. He didn't look angry, he looked, Cas wasn't very sure of emotions, but was that almost pride? "It's a great song, good choice Cas." Dean leaned his head back against the head rest, eyes closed, gently singing along. The sight made Cas suppress a gulp. "Dean I do not understand, there is no stairway to heaven. I am sure of it." A laugh burst from the hunter, "aw Cas, you really shouldn't take things so literal. Lean back, close your eyes, just listen don't question." Cas did as he was told, but he couldn't help stealing glances at the hunter, how simply listening to a song could wash away the years of pain on his face. Cas was still gazing at Dean when the hunter turned his head and opened his eyes to look at Cas. The song had ended a few minutes ago and now they were sitting in silence. Cas was contemplating what he had learned from the joint experience, but the hunter was still a mystery to him, an enigma, but one he enjoyed thinking about. The hunter leaned forward, and planted a kiss on the angel, it was rough and sloppy, Cas sensed a nervousness rolling off Dean, which gave way to relief as Cas returned the kiss with vigour. Breathing hard, they pulled away, "I very much liked that song Dean." Dean held Cas' gaze as he said with sincerity, "Well stick around and I'll show you some more."


	4. It's my Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> 2014 End!verse, was really looking forward to writing this one. But I have to say TW: suicide

Dean still hadn't gotten used to this new Castiel. The fallen angel had certainly made a niche for himself in the group of survivors, he was notorious for any vice going in the hell they were camping in. He watched his sullen future self pace the room, he definitely hadn't gotten used to _that_. Cas was sprawled out on a low bed, looking at his nails, wearing an expression of boredom. His clothes were still caked in dried sick however, and his hand shook slightly. "Why Cas, why? How could you be so stupid, why would you do this to the camp. They need you." Cas looked up sharply at that, "and what about you Dean, do you need me anymore, or am I just a pawn for keeping your precious camp happy?" The question was scathing, and did it's job. Hurt crossed future Dean's eyes, Dean was surprised at the level of hurt he could see on himself, an insult from Cas obviously cut him deep in the future. "I own my life Dean, I can do with it what I choose." Future Dean stormed out of the room, knocking into his past self who tumbled to the ground. Cas unsteadily got to his feet and offered a hand to Dean, "Man, future me is a dick." Dean said, gratefully accepting the hand up, "You got that right," Cas chuckled. "Where'd I go wrong," Dean fished for answers, but Cas simply rolled his eyes seeming to say you don't want to know. Cas led Dean to the edge of the bed and they sat down, Cas rubbing his temples. "Why did you do it Cas, you must know how important you are to him, to me I guess." For a minute Dean thought Cas was going to act exactly like he had with his douchy self, but Cas lifted his head and turned a tear stained face towards the hunter. "We live in a volatile world Dean, and, I got scared. I didn't want one of those... things taking my life for me. I wanted to decide, I know I'm not gonna live forever, but how is this living exactly." He gestured to the dingy room, in the silence between them, the snarls of the croats could almost be heard. Dean shivered, "but Cas, taking your own life, it's not the way, I thought you'd want to go guns blazing, like me." Cas full out laughed at that, and then laughed even more at the confused look on Dean's face. "Like you? Like you! Dean my friend, it was your idea to take the plunge in the first place." This led to an even more bewildered look on Dean's face. "Let me explain, when it all went to shit, right after Sam said yes, we fought oh yes we fought hard, but then the croats started taking over _everything_. Before our fearless leader set up this sanctuary, he was huddled with me in an abandoned theatre. Pressing a gun to his head, saying how he couldn't live without me, and trying to be all romantic and brave about seeing each other again, like Romeo and Juliet. We were just so damn terrified of losing each other and I'd have done anything for him, I still would, only I put up a bit of a fight first now. The only reason we didn't die that day was he stopped to give me a kiss, which turned into a longer kiss," a smirk spread across Cas' face, "which gave a stray dog time to dog run past us, distracting the croats, which also distracted us into rethinking our plans." Dean was pale. The story was awful he couldn't believe it of himself, but all he could think was _kiss, he and Cas kissed._ He felt ashamed that that was all he took from the story, but it was a vital bit of information, it was the reason for all the tension he'd been sensing between the former angel and his future self, it all made sense. What didn't make sense was how his future self acted now. But Cas was tired and couldn't take much more questions, he looked rough after over dosing and needed to rest, so Dean made to move off the bed, but Cas caught him in a surprisingly strong hug. "What's that for?" Dean asked, "I've got to take every opportunity Dean," There was a sadness behind the crystal eyes and Dean let Cas hold him, he would have let the man hold him for eternity if it helped him any. "Promise me you won't try this again, I do need you, even if I don't show it so well." Cas just nodded into his friends neck. Eventually Cas let go, he lay on the bed, sleep coming easy. 

Dean was being honest with himself and it came as no surprise to him that himself and Cas had been involved with each other. By the pained expressions he had witnessed on his own, older features, he realised it must have been pretty serious. But how it got so messed up he had no idea, he vowed he to use this experience to do everything in his power to stay by Cas. His angel back home had already done so much for him, and his brother, he would not allow this future to come to fruition. He found his future self sitting with dry tear tracks running down his cheeks and several empty beer cans. Dean sat down across from himself. "So Cas, you wanna talk about it?". His future self turned his hardened features to Dean, despair resting deep in his green eyes, "Nope." He replied curtly and turned his head away again. "Didn't think so." Sighed Dean, helping himself to a beer. He couldn't wait to get away.


	5. I Miss You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> So glad this song came up, I love it.

The dude was creepy, showing up in his dreams unannounced, turning them into a nightmare almost. Dean thought it was weird when he'd been dreaming about decent things, fishing, or fireworks with Sammy, but now the angel had started appearing in his twin busty asian beauties lap dance dreams, and those were definitely marked private. Whenever Dean confronted Cas about the lack of personal space physically and mentally, Cas only squinted at Dean and agreed to try harder. He had been improving in person, he no longer flew in to within an inch of Dean's lashes, but the dreams weren't getting any better. A particularly pleasant one involving a red head and some hand cuffs was interrupted by the sound of wings, and the arrival of a rather red faced Cas by the bed. Dean groaned as the woman disappeared and he remained cuffed to the bed, luckily the bed sheet still covered up to his waist. "Dude please, this like the 5th time this week, just give me a break will you. Leave my dreams alone." "Dean I apologise, but sometimes this is the best way to relay information, I can not control what dream I must access to reach you, that is down to the dreamer." Cas was putting up a valiant effort at not looking at Dean or the monolithic tent pole erection covered by the sheets, it was Dean's dream after all. Cas told Dean quickly about the intel he had on the hunt, then flew away without a goodbye. Dean tried to get back into the dream, but he didn't feel much like it after Cas' visit. He found himself awake in the motel and decided to start his day.

A week went by, and all Dean's dreams were completely trench-coated angel free. For the first couple of days it put him in a better mood than he'd been in a while, but doubt started to surface from the pit of his stomach. Was Cas ok, maybe something had gone wrong, the feeling of loss haunted Dean. He found himself dreaming about Cas, but it wasn't the real Cas, the details were faded or fuzzy,, the voice never quite right. He found himself going to bed earlier and for longer, praying through his dreams for any sign of Cas. Dean would get so worked up that his dreams would become confused, the blonde with the whip became Cas, the pole dancing stripper changed into Cas and one particular nap lead to Princess Leia from Star Wars morphing into Cas, bikini and all. Dean found it kind of hot. But it still didn't make up for the real thing, the real, almost physicality of Cas' voice alone made Dean ache with loss. They'd shared a bond, and he'd broken it.

Two weeks after Dean had last met with the angel, Castiel appeared in a standard fishing dream. Dean's relief was palpable. "I am very sorry Dean, but it was too strong, something was pulling me back into your dream, I fought it for as long as I could. But I failed, I apologise. I'll be on my way-" "Wait!" Dean called out, desperation leaking from his voice. "Don't leave, keep talking, I need to hear your voice, please." Castiel looked confused, but he complied. "What should I say Dean?" Dean just stared at his angel, taking in every mannerism that he'd missed, he didn't realise how much losing Cas had hurt until that moment. "Dean, are you alright?" Concern crossed Cas' face, "I'm better now you're here", Cas' face lit up at that, Dean conjured a seat next to his, and a second fishing rod. "Dean, I do not know how to fish." But Cas sat down next to Dean nonetheless. "Stay, and I'll show you", Cas made a confused face again, "I do not understand, you said you did not want me in your dreams, I stayed away, but then you started trying to pull me back into your dreams," Dean blushed at the memories of the situations he'd dreamt up with the angel, wondering if Cas knew. Cas continued, not noticing Dean's sudden reddening of the face and the hunter was grateful, "and now you want me to stay. You are very difficult to read Dean." A slight smile ghosted across Castiel's face. Dean could hardly breath, he licked his drying lips, "Cas, when I told you to leave, that was one of the dumbest damn things I've ever done, and I never want you to leave again, do you understand that? You can come into my head whenever you want." Dean looked deep into the sea blue abyss of the angel's eyes, "I understand", said Cas, voice heavy with sincerity. They sat for a while, in the warm breeze coming off the calm lake, the fish weren't catching but Dean didn't mind, he had his friend back. Dean noticed Cas staring at him, mouth slightly open as if he was away to say something, "you got something to share Cas?", the crinkles around Cas' eyes heightened as he squinted at Dean, "I was wondering if the invite to your dreams, extended to the ones where you have me in rather, provocative situations?" Dean's heart stilled, so he knew. He wished the ground could just swallow him up, he couldn't even look at his friend. When Cas had returned he'd got his hopes up, but now he felt like an idiot. An angel of the lord would have much more important things to deal with than have feelings for a lowly human."Dean? I would like that very much." That stilled Dean's heart again, he didn't think he could take much more. His head felt light as he looked at Cas smiling at him a little shyly, "g-good" Dean managed to stammer out of his choked throat. They sat watching the ripples on the water, leaning against each other, Dean couldn't wait until his next dream.


	6. The Chain

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is the lightly smutty chapter

The first thing Dean had done, once everything had settled down, was install a top end sound system in the bunker. The chosen one had a sub woofer that made the beer bottles rattle all the way in the kitchen. However, since finally starting a relationship with Cas, the sound system had been left abandoned, Dean choosing vast amounts of sex every time. Dean and Cas were lying on the bed, bodies entwined and lips locked, after the pain and loss they'd both been through, they couldn't get enough of each other when the world had finally levelled off. Cas broke away, pupils blown, a teasing smile on his face. He removed himself from Dean's limbs, lifted himself off the bed, and sashayed over to the neglected sound system. "Dean, when you were out getting supplies, I was listening to music. Can I try something?" Dean gazed hungrily at the ex-angel, "you can try anything" he growled.

Cas started to play a song, a gentle drum beat emanating from the speakers, just loud enough to give the room a bit of movement. "I like this song," As the harmonies came through, Cas mouthed along to the song, swaying his hips, "... I can still hear you say it, you will never break the chain...". Dean wasn't sure whether to watch him forever or jump him right that moment. Dean reached across the bed and pulled Cas down onto it by his boxers, hand fumbling across his cock. But Cas pushed his hand away, "no Dean, patience." Dean moaned into Cas' shoulder. Cas calmly lay back on the bed, humming along to the song,"... damn the dark, damn the light...", absently roaming his hands all over Dean, only briefly on his dick. "C'mon Cas, please" but that just made Cas grin wider. "It needs to be louder," Cas reached over and turned the volume up to the max.

A quiet moment, and then there it was, the sub woofer kicking in as the base line rocked through the room. Dean felt it in the pit of his stomach and hardly noticed the extra attention Cas was giving his cock, the music was so intense. As the guitar began blasting from the speakers too he could see Cas' body reacting to it. It was like they were in the centre of a storm as the room, the whole world seemed to vibrate around them. It was just Dean, Cas and the music, beating around their bodies, and filling up their insides too.

Suddenly there came a knocking from the door, loud and angry. As the song began to fade, and Cas was just working Dean into a frenzy, Sam's voice could be heard through the door, "-are trying to study, we can't all hide away. I've got work to do, so please, turn it DOWN." Cas went, shame-faced, to the speaker and turned it off. Dean sighed, "Son of a bitch." Body still throbbing from the physical force of the music, he waited for Cas to join him again. "Did you like my idea Dean?", hugging Cas close Dean grinned, "I loved it, just next time we're gonna make sure Sammy's in another state ok." 


	7. Dignity

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Fluff for a great song

Dean watched over his brother as he struggled to get to sleep, tossing and turning, reliving the countless nightmares of their lives. Eventually sleep took him, and Dean wandered back through to sit next to Cas at the research table. The ex-angel was busy reading some of the work in the men of letters' library that had sparked his interest, but as soon as Dean sat down, Cas put out a hand to hold Dean's. "Sam getting to sleep any easier?", Dean gave the man a tired smile, "yeah, went out like a light tonight, he's doing so much better." Dean knew Cas could see through the lie, but Cas only gripped Dean's hand tighter and went back to his book, just what Dean needed him to do. God, he loved him. "Hey Cas, once Sammy's better, what do you want to do?" Cas looked up, "well I would very much like to stay with you Dean, and I'm sure something will happen, a new jeopardy will threaten the world and the Winchester's will have to step in." A light joke, they both knew, but with their track record the joke held a certain grim truth."Why Dean, what are you thinking?" Dean coughed a little, not quite sure if he wanted to say what he was thinking. But he always felt comfortable talking with Cas so he took a deep breath and went ahead with it. "I think we should buy a yacht, leave this place, leave this life, sail away together. We've been working so hard, money's not a problem, we've been saving up with the fake cards all our lives. We could do it." The words were tumbling out of Dean, "we'll find somewhere to keep the Impala safe over winter, we'll sail around the coast, Sam can joins us too." Cas leaned in closer to Dean, and brushed his nose against Dean's cheek. 

"That sounds wonderful Dean, we could lie on the deck and watch the sunset, I'd like that-"  
"Or go swimming together in the sea-"  
"Explore caves along the coast-"  
"Go fishing whenever we wanted-"  
"Hold onto each other during a storm-"  
"Hold Sam's hair back when he's sea sick-"  


They sat in silence, pondering the possibilities. "Dean it's a wonderful idea, but do you really think we could do it?" Dean looked into those blue eyes, the eyes that could bore deep into his soul. "nah, just day-dreaming Cas." Covering up his disappointment with a grin. He couldn't hide anything from Cas though, the ex-angel leaned forward and kissed the hunter, while running a hand through his hair, "It's a good day-dream, maybe one day." Cas had such a look of hope in his eyes it made Dean's insides crumble. He stared at Cas for a while as the man turned back to his book, "knowing us we probably wouldn't get away from hunting, even in the middle of the ocean." Cas smirked at that, keeping his eyes on the book he replied, "Dean, I do not think demons much like the sea." Dean leaned back in his seat, entwining his long legs with Cas', "Cas, have I ever told you about vampirates?" 


	8. Girl all the Bad Guys Want

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set after season 8

The hunter's were searching for a cross roads demon doing particularly shady deals in a particularly shady part of town. Sam had noticed how depressed Dean was after the angel's fell and Cas didn't reappear. It had been over two months and no sign of their friend. they didn't even know if he was even alive. Sometimes as Sam was walking past Dean's room in the bunker, he heard his older brother praying to Cas, even though it definitely wouldn't work now. So Sam had searched for a hunt. It was the perfect one, a demon- so they'd get to kill something and a bar- so they'd get a drink. The bar the demon was known to frequent was a biker bar, just outside of the main town. Locals steered clear, it was the place you only went to get blinding drunk, and if you got caught up in a fight would most end up dead. Dean was looking forward to it. 

The brothers got their beers and sat at some stools out of the way of the main crowd to keep a lookout. "Man I'm still seeing Cas everywhere," Dean said with sad eyes, taking a drink from his beer. Sam made a confused face, "you're seeing Cas in places? Like after purgatory? Dude don't say that here, they're going to think you're gay or something." Dean just took another gulp of his drink, eyes low and dark. Then Sam gripped his arm, "oh my god, I see him too. Over there, I think." The man Sam pointed to was sitting on the knee of a burly biker with a mullet, he wore skin tight leather pants, with a studded buckle, dark hair longer than they'd ever seen on him, a ripped Godsmack t-shirt and to top it all off a nose ring. But it was definitely Cas. Sam and Dean both watched in shocked silence as a woman draped herself across Cas' shoulders, as other bikers looked jealously on. Cas nodded towards the bar and the biker he was sitting on, lifted him off and made his way to the bar, he was instantly replaced by another guy who pulled Cas and the woman towards him. "Should we say hi, or...", Sam stopped as he looked at his brother warily, Dean's eyes were blazing, his cheeks red, his whole body thrummed with anger, "Dean we should go, you're going to get yourself killed, please c'mon." But Dean wouldn't budge. He drained his beer, then drained Sam's, then made his way towards Cas.

Cas made a startled noise as the hunter ripped him away from the gang of admiring hard asses. Several of the crowd stood up, fists ready, but Cas gestured for them to sit back down. "Dean, I can't believe it, I knew I'd see you eventually, maybe not here, but, you wouldn't believe the experience I've had." Dean noticed the change in his ex-angel immediately, he seemed more comfortable in his skin, his language more fluid and natural, even the nose ring added a certain hotness to Cas which Dean couldn't ignore, but the anger still boiled within the hunter. "Two months, two fucking months Cas, I didn't hear a word, I thought you... I thought." His words trailed off as Cas pulled Dean into a hug, right there in the middle of the bar, bodies so close Cas' studs scarped Dean's own belt. Dean knew Sam and the bikers were watching but he didn't give a crap, Cas was alive and holding him. The man whispered in the hunter's ear, "I'm sorry Dean, when I fell I was so broken, I didn't want to place the burden of fixing me on your shoulders. I couldn't bring myself to show you just how damaged I was. This bar took me in, assumed I was just ill from narcotics, they helped me get better. The gang have just sort of taken a shine to me I guess. But you were my motivation for surviving." That statement stemmed Dean's flow of anger slightly, only slightly. When he felt a weight on his shoulder, which he knew wasn't Sam's he turned round and gave his fist all that he had in the general vicinity of a face. His punch struck home as the biker let out a furious scream. "DEAN what are you doing?" Cas cried from behind him, the bikers all jumped to their feet to defend their bleeding comrade. Dean positioned Cas behind him as he felt the presence of Sam at his side. 

Great, two against what, six, seven, eight? and their clothes alone are some serious weapons, thought Dean. "Way to go Rocky, what you go and do that for?," Sam whispered."Cas likes the tough guys, I'm showing him I'm a tough guy too." Sam's eyes widened at that, but he said no more. Cas made a little cough from behind the brothers, "seriously Dean, son of a bitch, you think I would question your strength, of all people. Shit, you're willing to get yourself and Sam beaten up, probably killed over it, stupid ass idea." Dean could practically hear Cas roll his eyes, he could get used to the way this human Cas spoke. The deep voice moulded well to mocking, sweary, mumbling. Cas continued as the bikers taunted the hunters, "I like you just the way you are you little shit, even if you don't have a mullet, thank god you don't have a mullet your hair is fucking beautiful just the way it is. And you don't _have_ to wear leather pants to make me like you, I hope you like mine though. You better like mine, they're hotter on the floor though, you can always try-", "CAS SHUT UP," Dean screamed red faced, Sam had tears practically running down his face from laughing, even though impending doom was storming towards them with a pool cue.

"HOLD THE FUCK UP," the oak tree of a barman screamed, brandishing a shotgun at the scene, "take it outside gents, I alr'dy had my quota o' brawls f'r this week. Try not g't too much blood 'n the cars, cheers. Now, GET THE FUCK OUT MY BAR."

The brothers and the ex-angel took that as their cue and bombed it out of the door, straight to the impala where they didn't stop laughing until the motel was in sight. "Hey, Dean, why don't you drop me off here. I'm sure you and Cas have lots to, discuss. And I fancy a drink without the side of death threats." Dean pulled over as Sam opened the door to get out, "just, please stick to your own bed, you know, if we're going to be staying here for another night." Sam laughed as Dean blushed scarlet, "Screw you Sammy," Dean mumbled, "Oh not me Dean," Sam joked as he slammed the door. Dean shivered as Cas' deep chuckles from the back seat rolled over him.


	9. Down in Mexico

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> this song is used in Quentin Tarantino's Death Proof, which is an awesome film, I recommend watching in full, but if you'd rather not watch the full film, but want to know what the hell happens in the scene for this song, check it out somewhere on youtube :)

The pop corn was all gone halfway through their first film and Dean had finished his liquorice by the first titles. Reservoir dogs, Pulp fiction and Jackie Brown had rolled by. The QT marathon was going well, Sam and him both loved the films, which was a rare thing indeed, and Cas was snuggled against Dean's side, taking in all the films had to offer. Every so often, at particularly gory parts, Cas would mutter to himself, "you watch this for fun," but he seemed to be enjoying it. Or at least enjoying the thrill the films brought to Dean. As the end credit ran in all their monochrome majesty of Kill Bill Vol. 2, Dean got up and stretched. "Want a break, before I change discs?" Cas and Sam both rubbed their eyes, but shook their heads too. "Keep them coming Dean," Sam replied. Dean smirked and put Death Proof into the disc slot.

Dean loved that film, he loved how the cars were key, and all the kick ass moves in the second half, he'd always sort of struggled with the first half. It wasn't that he didn't enjoy the first part of the film, it's just that the second half was so electrifying that he got impatient. But Dean relished the enjoyment Cas seemed to get from the first part of the film. Sam sat up slightly as the vocals of "Down in Mexico" started and Arlene strutted smoothly towards the stuntman sitting in his chair. Dean always used to tease Sam at this part because Sam had a crush on Vanessa Ferlito. Dean smirked at his brother as Sam threw him the finger, trying not to look interested but failing. To Dean's surprise Cas sat up and gazed intently as things began to get more intimate between the characters, oh no way was he letting his boyfriend get turned on by anyone other than him. Jealousy started prickling at Dean, and he pulled Cas closer into his side, letting the film know that Cas was his. Dean was going to make a remark but he was silenced, in awe of the ferocity of which Cas was staring at the screen, hungry eyes fixed and eating the action up.

As the scene cut away the tension in the room didn't ease, Sam was still watching the film but kept throwing concerned glances at Cas and Dean. Dean never took his eyes off Cas, film forgotten. Cas' face was covered in complete confusion, as if he was struggling to find the meaning of life on the screen. Eventually Dean paused the film, "what the hell is up with you Cas?" Cas glanced up at Dean, a blush forming on his cheeks. "Dean I apologise, it's just, what did that woman do? I feel a want to elicit the same response from you.", It was Dean's turn to blush, "a lap dance Cas, it was a lap dance." Dean managed to stutter out. It wouldn't have been half as awkward if Sam wasn't there. "hmm, Dean would you mind if I gave you one of these lap dances." Cas' eyes were dark and full of urgency, Dean didn't even pay attention to Sam's whinging about being, "scarred for life," and in need of "intensive therapy or a lobotomy", the hunter grabbed the man by the wrist and dragged him off the couch. On his way to the bedroom he threw the remote at his still mumbling brother, "enjoy the rest of the film, bitch." "Jerk", Sam called back, pressing play on the film and turning up the volume, but Dean and Cas were long out of ear shot. 


	10. Christie Road

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Set some time in season 5.

Dean had gone out for gas, some beers and maybe a slice of pie. Sam was in research mode and Dean didn't much feel like staying in the mouldy room with nothing to do, he'd thought about calling Cas, but the dude was probably busy. He'd gone to a pump slightly further away than necessary, relishing the freedom. He had filled her up and was heading inside the shop when the skin on the back of his neck prickled. An old man leaning against a pump, chewing the end of a cigarette, pushed himself straight and smirked over Dean's shoulder. The hunter heard a scuffle from behind and dropped and rolled to the side, just as a gangly teen leapt to the spot he'd just occupied. The old man and the teen smiled cruelly at each other and turned to glare at Dean, with black, black eyes. "Well shit." Dean said as he surreptitiously reached for Ruby's knife from the back of his jeans. An iron grip clamped around his wrist, "we're not interested in what you've got down your pants Winchester," a voice said harshly into his ear from behind, and at least two other ugly laughs could be heard behind him. "Move and I'll break your arm, got that?" Dean just clamped his teeth tight and held his tongue, not wanting to make it any worse than it already was. Then the two other demons started laying into him, only occasionally asking where his brother was, but they were having too much fun pounding their fists into Dean's body to care about Sam. Eventually, when Dean could barely stay conscious they took a step back. The old man demon let out a low whistle as his eyes roamed over the Impala. "You don't seem to be hurting very much," he said to Dean who was panting on the ground, every word dripping with evil, he sneered at the car, "I almost feel bad for this... almost," and with that he brought a fingernail right along the side of Dean's baby, bumper to bumper, gouging out the metal. The shrieking sound hit Dean's ears and it was almost as if his baby was crying out in pain, the noise tearing at Dean's heart. Even when the demon had stopped, the tortuous sound continued, Dean didn't even realise it was coming from his own mouth until his throat protested in agony. The demons gazed at the broken man, shocked at what they'd inflicted.

Suddenly a blinding white light, and a voice in Dean's ear, a low, growl of a voice that sent a warm feeling of recognition through the hunter, said "think of somewhere that isn't here." A bit vague thought Dean, but as the light was still blinding, and it was the voice of his angel, Dean thought of a place.

Gravel cut into the mans knees and there was a feeling of space around him. Dean tentatively opened his eyes but the only brightness was from the weak sun above. Castiel stood by the Impala, gently caressing the ugly wound, a deep pain showing in his blue eyes that hitched Dean's breath. Cas looked down at the still kneeling hunter, "I do not know if you wish me to heal your car Dean, or if you wish to fix it yourself." Dean kept his eyes on Cas' fingers as he tenderly brushed the twisted metal. "Please fix her Cas," Dean breathed, and the angel affectionately turned towards the car and again caressed the scar, this time leaving a shining complete surface after his trailing fingers. "Thank you Cas, how'd you know to come get me?" The angel let out a low chuckle as Dean inspected his work, the hunter's face full of wonder, "I sensed your pain, it was overwhelming. I was sure something must have happened to your brother. I needed to fix your pain Dean." Dean looked at Cas and settled himself on the hood of the Impala, Cas looked worn out, the vessel showing signs of exhaustion which had Dean worried. He patted the space next to him on the hood, Cas hesitated for a second, obviously wary of the honour it was to be offered a seat on the Impala's hood. Dean was secretly thrilled that his angel treated his baby with such reverence and respect, it was more than he got from Sammy.

They sat in silence for a bit, not exactly uncomfortable but there was definitely a tension which Dean couldn't place, Dean almost asked for Cas to use his mojo to get a couple of beers but the guy looked beat. "Dean, where are we? and why?", Dean stared around at the landscape, how much did he want to tell, but he smiled and shook his head a bit, this was Cas, he felt safe telling him anything. Cas squinted at the man. "Dad and I had a few hunts in this area when I was younger, spent a bit of time in the town down the road, this is just an abandoned bit of rail track but it feels as much a home as anything else in the past. I didn't have much... any friends, so when I needed to get away from my own head for a bit I'd come here, have a few drinks, get a bit high. Whenever we were kind of close and I needed a break, this is where I'd head to. Being alone here, I never felt lonely. I've never taken any one else here." Dean smiled at Cas, he didn't even share this place with Sam, but sharing it with Cas, he didn't mind, he revelled in it, which surprised him. "Then I will leave you, I can come back and collec-" "NO! I mean... I... Cas, I want you here. And you look like you need a rest." Dean subconsciously rubbed the back of his neck as he looked at his shoes. Chancing a glance at Cas he instantly regretted it as a blush rose up his face, Cas was staring so intently at the hunter Dean felt exposed. The angel's eyes were full of gratitude, thanks, understanding, tiredness and a whole heap of different emotions which Dean couldn't name, but he felt them warm him through the gaze. The look only lasted a second, but Dean would have sworn a year had passed. Cas looked away and settled himself back on the Impala, closing his eyes, not sleeping, just resting. Dean licked his suddenly dry lips, "Cas, buddy, you doing ok?" Cas sighed opening his eyes, holding a finger to Dean's lips, "hush Winchester, I don't know what's affecting my Grace so much, so don't ask." As Cas settled down back on the hood Dean nudged himself in closer to the angel's side, he wasn't sure why he did it, but as soon as he did he felt an ache of longing he didn't know he had disappear, Cas must have felt it too because he slid an arm round Dean to hold the hunter in closer. Dean didn't think too much into it or he'd freak, but all he knew was he'd never felt so much at home as in that moment. 


	11. Credits

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! It's been fun :) hope you enjoyed.

1\. Just Dance- Lady Gaga  
2\. We Are Young- Fun.  
3\. Stairway To Heaven- Led Zeppelin  
4\. It's My Life- Bon Jovi  
5\. I Miss You- Blink 182  
6\. The Chain- Fleetwood Mac  
7\. Dignity- Deacon Blue  
8\. Girl All The Bad Guys Want- Bowling for Soup  
9\. Down In Mexico- The Coasters (Death Proof Soundtrack)  
10\. Christie Road- Green Day  



End file.
